You ain’t daddy’s little girl, I’m a little girl’s dad – alter your perspective: change your life

You ain’t daddy’s little girl, I’m a little girl’s dad – alter your perspective: change your life

Posted 1 week, 2 days ago @

It’s amazing how changing your perspective can completely change your world. We so often get stuck in the rut of the way we look at things that we stagnate, repeat the same mistakes, and gradually become more and more disillusioned. But just how do you set about changing your perspective?

Aussie hip hop MC Tim Levinson (Urthboy) poetically explores a dramatic shift in perspective in relation to the raising of his daughter.

His song “Little Girl’s Dad” begins descriptively, with a simple explanation of his experience before her birth, of his life, and circumstance. He describes modest dreams and day-to-day chores.

You can easily imagine all the thousands of people to whom life happens, as they just do the best they can with what they’ve got based entirely what they’ve learned from their own upbringing. Sometimes that’s successful, and sometimes that fails us miserably.

The songwriter in this case has noticed that the world is by and for, men. His child is a daughter – and he can see that she may not have every opportunity that a son may have: ” I’m sorry you inherited a man’s world” he sings to her. He also realises that as his relationship with his little girl is one of male to female, it may also succumb to the same inequality inherent in society, something he opposes, writing “It’s not the way it’s got to be.”

While implicitly acknowledging that the relationship is about power, He also seeks to subvert the power with a simple change of perspective. That is, by noticing that which he prefers to change, that which he prefers to be, and acting in that manner, he can in fact alter how he raises his child.

“You ain’t daddy’s little girl, I’m a little girls dad.”

It’s a beautiful line, rich with meaning. He is not the owner of his little girl, he isn’t in charge of her, has no power over her. By rejecting the notion that he holds the power, he transforms the relationship. By perceiving himself in a support role, he gives his daughter every chance to be, to strive; confident and supported. You can imagine this principle could be a guiding one as they navigate through her childhood and on to her own adulthood.

To me, the most wonderful thing about this perspective shift is the transformative nature of it. By viewing the world and his place in it differently, the songwriter has changed not only his own world, but also the world that his daughter will grow up in.

Stepping back from and observing our problems or talking them over with someone objective, can often help to make our perspective clear. It can also show up that the way we’re looking at the world isn’t the way we prefer it to be. Clients often find that the greatest source of their unhappiness is the gulf between their dreams and their reality. Changing perspective is often a successful way to bring them into alignment.

Shifting our gaze, re-setting our defaults, and seeing the world through our preferences can be a life-changing thing. It’s often not that the world is happening to us, beating us, working against us, but that we’re allowing our view of it to defeat us.

“…it’s your world to take back.” Make it so.

Little Girl’s Dad
Urthboy
I kept a little journal from before you were born
And wrote about the shape of mama’s belly you formed
I filled a lot of pages up inside that first six months
You notice every single movement and it’s all too much
Brought you back to our tiny two bedder in Dulwich Hill
Salute to the red brick—to some of us you’re still a big deal
You see I never thought I’d own my home
But here we are as the sun sets, neighbour chats away on his phone
They say you grow up so quick, I don’t know about that
But your clothes sure as hell do
And now lunch is getting packed and my diary lost track
So I’ve got something to tell you[Hook]
You ain’t daddy’s little girl, I’m a little girl’s dad
That’s the way it’s going to be
And I’m sorry you inherited a man’s world, baby
It’s not the way it’s got to be
You ain’t daddy’s little girl he’s a little girl’s dad
And it’s your world to take back
Cause the men are going to try and tell you what you can and can’t be
And you ain’t going to stand for that
[Pre-Verse Ad-Lib]
That’s a nice way of saying that *laughs*
So let’s start this one again[Verse 2]
There’s so many textbooks, websites, experts
Telling you the way you should bring up your kid
When genetics kick in there isn’t a way of knowing anything
About the thousand lives you may live
We don’t keep it safe as we can possibly make it
Cause I don’t want to wrap you up in wool
Thought it was different but I was mistaken
If I ever led you to believe that we’re in control
See your chubby little arms reaching up to be held
I just want to hold you tightly and shield any pain
With your head upon my shoulders you can feel how the fire works
But also be protected from the heat of the flame
And when it seems like despair in this broken world
Knowing I will be there and ready whenever you fall
You’re somebody’s revelation, ain’t nobody’s girl
So no matter what direction you walk, kid you’ve got my support
They say you grow up so quick I don’t know about that
‘Cause you learn with everything you do
Now the months are so packed and my diary lost track
So I’ve got something to tell you[Pre-Hook Ad-Lib]
Let me say it like

[Hook]
You ain’t daddy’s little girl, I’m a little girl’s dad
That’s the way it’s going to be
And I’m sorry you inherited a man’s world, baby
It’s not the way it’s got to be
You ain’t daddy’s little girl he’s a little girl’s dad
And it’s your world to take back
Cause the men are going to try and tell you what you can and can’t be
And you ain’t going to stand for that

[Post-Hook]

[Verse 3]
You make your mistakes; I’ve made mine
You do as you wish, take your time
Say whatever you think that’s your right
What does life in the other’s shoes look like?
You were born with a strength you could never hide
So when they try you push you to the side
Push em right back, you don’t ever have to step aside
Cause a lot of rules made well, they don’t apply
You make your mistakes; I’ve made mine
You do as you wish, take your time
Little homie you don’t ever have to step aside
Cause a lot of rules made well, they don’t apply

[Hook]
You ain’t daddy’s little girl, I’m a little girl’s dad
That’s the way it’s going to be
And I’m sorry you inherited a man’s world, baby
It’s not the way it’s got to be
You ain’t daddy’s little girl he’s a little girl’s dad
And it’s your world to take back
Cause the men are going to try and tell you what you can and can’t be
And you ain’t going to stand for that

Chris Mehl

Menstuff

www.menstuff.com.au


Category : Blog &Fatherhood &Happiness &Manhood &Parenting &Young Men

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